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[November 15th, 2005] [ music | the cure ] new lj gender____bombs comment

wTF?!??! [November 13th, 2005] i went to a show yesterday it was fun and mike didnt call me :( comment

:( [November 8th, 2005] [ mood | uncomfortable ] [ music | the plain t's ] "Hey There Delilah" hey there delilah whats it like in new york city im a thousand miles away but girl tonight you look so pretty yes you do time square cant shine as bright as you i swear its true hey there delilah dont you worry about the distance im right there if you get lonely give this song another listen close your eyes listen to my voice its my disguise im by your side oh its what you do to me oh its what you do to me oh its what you do to me oh its what you do to me what you do to me hey there delilah i know times are gettin hard but just believe me girl someday ill pay the bills with this guitar we'll have it good we'll have the life we knew we would my word is good hey there delilah ive got so much left to say if every simple song i wrote to you would take your breath away id write it all even more in love with me youd fall we'd have it all oh its what you do to me oh its what you do to me oh its what you do to me oh its what you do to me a thousand miles seems pretty far but they've got planes and trains and cars id walk to you if i had no other way our friends would all make fun of us and we'll just laugh along because we know that none of them have felt this way delilah i can promise you that by the time that we get through the world will never ever be the same and youre to blame hey there delilah you be good and dont you miss me two more years and youll be done with school and ill be makin history like i do you know its all because of you we can do whatever we want to hey there delilah heres to you this ones for you oh its what you do to me oh its what you do to me oh its what you do to me oh its what you do to me what you do to me 1 read comment

the way i feel [November 6th, 2005] [ mood | sad ] [ music | the spillcanvas ] i feel like shit. i went to allys party and talked to monica allot then i went to allys room and cried cause i really hate my school and i really miss mike. then ally and all these people walked me home and me and ally talked and i got home at 12:30 oops. um yeah ive been crying allot all i want is to be happy most of my friends are in really great relationships and it sucks to see them together i hate it i sound really selfish great...... bye 3 read comment

[October 30th, 2005] [ mood | melancholy ] [ music | radiohead ] i fucking hate this megan hates me for no reason i cant stand this i try to be her friend and everything i do is wrong i really dont care if she reads this im really sick of longisland and all this pointless drama its so fucking annoying i realy like her as a friend so much but i finally realized that she couldnt give a shit if we were friends or not thats exactly how i feels i bet she fucking hates me cause i didnt know what to say when jimmy was being mean i tried to be nice but no she took it out on me and called me a jerk and then she just stopped talking to me and i messaged her allot and she didnt care so now im fucking screwed and then she leaves me comments on how im annoying and on how i ruin her fun i didnt o anything bad in the first place all i did was be myself maybe she never liked me ugh i wast my time on people so much i should stop making friends all they do is make drama im moving i really hate it here or either im running away this is so stupid i cant believe people can be so immature bye 1 read comment

[October 17th, 2005] [ music | the stills ] i havent been here in like 49086094830789 days... ok friday ok so school was boring i was happy it was over and then i went home and meg, ivy, and lisa came to visit me and i had to pick them up at the train station and my grandpa was being and asshole. They asked me if my grandpa understood why i was calling him an asshole and he didnt cause he dosent speak english lol. i told megan my grandma was fat and shes like how fat and i said shes like a ball. She was gonna say "your grandma is fat" in spanish hahah but she didnt cause me and ivy told her not to hahah i love her shes so cute. Then we got to my house omg i hate it there i was shaking and i had drawn a picture of megan and she loved it. Then i gave them paper stars i made and they loved them. I got sick of my house so i asked them if they wanted to get food and it was raining outside. So meg got her poncho out that she found at the sayville trainstation ahhah it smelled like beer ugh it was gross hahha. She looked so cut when we were walking there and i wanted to go see skyla and they thought my house was like 490385690864 miles away when it was a block away and we stayed in the pizzaria for like half an hour. I ate megs pizza shes so funny i was scratching my chin and meg and lisa thought i was mentally retarted. Then this kid came in and i told megan to look and ivys like shut up megan will laugh in his face shes so FUCKING CUTE!ugh i love her lol. There so funny i was like pouring this topping stuff on the table and lisa was like "that is so disrespectful" she said it so seriously i was laughing so hard. then they took a taxi home and i said goodbye i was sad :( they all hugged me though! :D i walked home in the rain idc though i had fun. saturday woke up...darlena imed me and she asked me if i wanted to see anh i havent seen her in a while cause she moved up state. I didnt have a ride and catherine randomly im's me and she asked me if i wanted to go with friendlys then dayna im's me and she told me she cut her hair i was in shock. So i told her to come and like chill then catherine picked me up and we got there i saw dayna she looked cool but like it was a wierd haircut. We ate then went to daynas crib and i begged to cut her hair and i did she looked cool but it was too short then her mom came home she was pissed shes like your on my shit list GREAAAATTTTT. Dayna had to go to sayville and her mom drove me and catherine to sam goody. i bought a magazine there and then i was going to walk to jackies house when i hear someone say my name and it was vinnie cara and mellanie lol i was like HOLY SHIT they all hugged me well cara like dry humped me lol then this kid nick ran up to me and hes like omg juan! idiot... so then i went in there with them and my friend catherine and like they were all eating and it was fun and ii walked in and kate and jeff hugged me and i saw shamsa and elan..i didnt really know them (no offense)but elan and shamsa were really cool...cara made me go to herniks scene 16 party at bennagins it was fun but then all these assholes came and like they were making fun of us like everyone was gonna leave then at the end of the party then kates like you want to go to friendlys imlike okay then we go there and tom, hillary, and danielle came and kate got me icecream it was sooooo good thanks k8. Then mellanie comes in and shes like lets go im like wait i have to say bye to cara and shes like she leftim like fuck i feel bad..so then mellanie drove me home in her van i left my magazine sw33t there omg i love that van cause it squeeks when she reverses lol and the chairs shift. i love that spic it was a great night :D sunday woke up cara im'ed me and i told her to go to party city and i picked her up. Then we went to nathans and elan and vinnie came they ate then we left. went to starbucks joey was there with this kid who wore biker gloves lol. i got a frappacino yum. we chilled there then mike win came and we left starbucks and walked over too carvel and tony and jeff worked there. Elan works there and he got me free ice cream :D it was really good i never eat carvel then me and cara and vinnie walked to his house stayed there for a while read books then vinnies mom gave us cupcakes and then she drove me and cara to her house she dressed up like a scene girl and she gave me some money for a taxi it was fun i love her allot. shes a cool friend :). today um school was stupid i bonded with ashley breuer shes my best friend i love her allot i love alexa osani shes soooooooooooooooooooo funny um yeah today wasnt that great my moms letting me paint my room im prob going for a brown or a olive color maybe im not sure or maybe like a dull red or a mustard im not sure i have like a while to think about it if you have any ideas just tell me please in a comment! pzzzz ♥ juan ton 4 read comment

ok..dentist! [October 12th, 2005] [ mood | blah ] [ music | frou frou ] today i woke up at 8:36....thats really bad. I got up and i was like wtf is today saturday and like i see my aunt in the hallway and she just stares at me and im like wtf is she doing here then i go back to sleep. i wake up like two minutes later and im like ugh i get up brush my teeth get dressed then. I look around for my grandpa and hes like doing something with some car in my driveway. And im like take me to school. At first i didnt know what to do i was like should i just stay home or go to school and get super and i thought of making my mom write a note but if she found out i woke up late i would get in trouble anywayz. So i told my grandpa to drive me home and hes like "YOUR NOT GOING TO SCHOOL TODAY". Im like "YES!" and then he tells me im going to the dentist with my aunt thats why she was staring at me and like getting ready and stuff and then i turned on the computer cause i was already then she gives me like ten minutes to get off the computer and we go and like the whole car ride was so boring 20 minutes before we get then i go to sleep lol. Then i wake up and i see like airplane like 20 feet over us. I was complaining the whole time in my head that i shouldnt be missing school and stuff. It sucks making up work. So when i got there they found an infection in my tooth and i have like a litle red bump in it. Its so gross. So they cleaned my teeth that was painful ugh...then they put this shit in my teeth and i like drooled all over myself great! it was embarrasing and im like "okay we going home now" and i totally forgot my aunt worked there...(i didnt notice the scrubs she was wearing). So i got to go around gay ass queens and i got gloves and i got to take pictures on her cellphone and hang out with this girl named iris. Shes really sweet she has a son and hes two years old and his name is octavio jr. he was named after his dad which i thought was stupid i just didnt want to say it to her..she was really funny shes been working there for 6 years she dropped out of school when she was a freshman and worked there since it was a shock at first cause like i expected her to be like a graduate and like a college graduate also but she wasnt. i felt bad for her but eh what can you do? So we left and then the whole car ride we talked about school and my cousin is missing ten homeworks in my old social studies teachers class hes such an asshole. i always ask him if he has homework and he always lies to me. i was thinking in the car like congragulating my self for having such a good lie detector...but then i thought maybe i dont. i only thought i didnt cause i just been in really heartbreaking relationships and maybe they just lied to me the whole times cause like i never had a long relationship that actually meant anything. So maybe they lied to me the whole time or i dunno im just wierd like that. I think about how people hate me like i always think people are talking about me even my mom. Like in my head i imagine a d face then them saying the most vile things you could say to me ugh im pathetic. so my day was good i didnt fight with my mom and she gave me money so it was allllllll good. :) pz out. ♥ juan comment

... [October 11th, 2005] [ mood | calm ] [ music | annie ] Ok today was cool last night i stayed up until three in the morning. so i woke up like 12 and my brother was like crying like he was dying. so that woke me up mostly. Then i couldnt find my toothbrush so i asked my grandpa for one and hes like the only one i have is pink and im like who cares its a tooth brush so yeah i got it. then i decided to make a fruit salad and then i ate it and i watched some re-runs of my super sweet sixteen. My cousin jhared kept saying funny things and i was really hyper cause the fruit salad had like condensed milk on it and it was like really really sugary. so he was saying like stupid shit and i couldnt stop laughing and like it took me 20 minutes to stop laughing at one joke. Then i went online and like i was on for like four hours till i told skyla to come on and then we made plans on going to sayville and i really wanted to see ivy and yeah so then i got out of the shower and miguel and milly showed up and when ever my moms friends are around shes a bitch. so i asked her if i could go to babylon but i was gonna take a train to sayville with skyla and she said no so then i was like ok. i told skyla to come over anyways then my mom made dinner and it was good me and milly joked around my mom also noticed i got my shirt back which she was bitching about for like a month. Then me and skyla just hungout and i was like do you want to go to the movies and shes like sure. An hour before the movie i was like we dont have a ride home. So i called ally that was settled then i told my friend marci to come but her mom was being a bitch so i said forget it lol. So i asked my cousin to take me and skyla and she said okay. Then i asked my mom for money and she started yelling at me cause i forgot she didnt work this week so she didnt have money and i only asked her once and she was like going nuts. Then i walked skyla home with jhared and we fought the whole time i hate him hes such an asshole he took my friends bike and we fought about that then we fought about my cousin tatiana cause shes "pregnant" so i was like i dont care cause shes stupid and shes yeah shes just stupid. I got back home and milly and miguel left so we said goodbye then i went on the computer and made this journal and watched some of closer and the new weeds episode god i love that show its so good like i wanna meet the writer of that show. They have such a genuine mind i think i spelt that wrong oh well. yeah so now im writing this i love first entrys there always the best :D 2 read comment

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